Where I come from, I am not just myself
I am a bunch of identities
I am my father and mother’s daughter
Sister to my 5 siblings
Aunt to my 11 nieces and 1 nephew
Niece to my several aunts and uncles;
Maternal, paternal and the kind borne out of societal bonding
I am my friends’ friend …I hope
Where I come from, I am the girl who finished school without falling pregnant
And not only got one degree but two
A few hate me for it
Some envy me because of it
Others admire me for doing it
I might even be considered a role model by a few because of it
It is also where I from that I am considered an ageing spinster
27 years old and not married!
I am considered to have outstretched my era of ripeness
Who wants to pick fruit that is ripe to the point of getting rotten?
I am almost totally unmarriageable
Worse still with the label ‘lawyer’ hanging over my head
I am more than spoiled goods
Who wants an opinionated and argumentative wife?
They prefer them soft spoken, keeping their opinions to themselves
Where I come from I am a member of my congregation
I love to sing, praise and worship in my church
I love listening to my Pastor’s sermons
Delivered in Shona; my mother tongue
If translated to English, TD Jakes’ own
Would pale in comparison
It is also where I come from
That I love to hang out at ‘Jazz 105’
Listen to the soothing sounds of African jazz
Go to the Red Fox watch my reggae brothers and sisters
Delivering amazing performances
Reggae music is conscious music
But if my pastor were to see me there
He would find a reason to pray for me the next day
I want to be a mother and wife
Have the proverbial husband, two kids (make that 3 for me) and a dog
I want to raise those kids and watch them grow
But I want to be a career woman too
I want to see the world, explore it, and transform it
But I also want a home and roots
I am a woman, yes
I am educated, yes
I love my career, yes
I want to get married, yes
I am a Christian, yes
I love art and will go nether beyond to find it, yes
How do I keep these aspirations together?
How do I fight these stereotypes?
How do I make people understand that the
Multiple facets of my character make the whole me?
How? How? How?
Should I even bother?
I fight patriarchy and patriarchy fights back
I fight societal prejudices and they fight back
Subtle is their fight that when I make noise against them
I am the fool, I am paranoid, I am being defensive
This struggle must end
This struggle will end
And I can be who I want to be
I will be who I want to be
I must be who I want to be
Without having to face judgement at every turn